Best Friends Play
Dark Souls
| |
Watch this series on the website | |
Game | Dark Souls |
Episodes | 76 |
Combined Length | 38:03:42 |
Original Run | Dec 25, 2016 - May 1, 2017 |
Controller | Woolie |
“I've gotta face fuck you. I'm sorry.” — Woolie
“That's a horrible sentence I hope I never hear in my life.” — Pat
Best Friends Play Dark Souls is a full Let's Play in which Pat and Woolie break out the emergency LP in order to prevent the channel from hollowing any further but get Woolie exposed in the process.
Total On-Screen Deaths: 142
About[]
- “'”
- — Website playlist description
See the individual episode descriptions at the Dark Souls (Full Let's Play) Descriptions page.
Quotes[]
- “This is a nice couch. It'd be a shame if I covered it with my entrails.”
- — Pat
- “What the fuck is lip asperity?”
- — Pat
- “I ain't 'fraid of no fucking trademark, copyright, hashtag, bitch-nigga ghosts.”
- — Woolie
- “Copyright that? I would love, I would love, to see that meeting at the patent office.”
- — Pat
- “Woolie, your face is so black. Look at it. It's like... it's like looking into the abyss.”
- — Pat
- “Lordran is an awesome, mythical place.”
- — Pat
- “I thought it was just a foggy asshole.”
- — Woolie
- “A foggy asshole, huh? Is that some kind of sex move? It's when you're in England, and you're in the alley, and you just put it in whatever you find.”
- — Pat
- “The burg is JonTron.”
- — Pat
- “It would make sense that Bonfire-chan would be the most tsun-tsun of all the firey tsundere.”
- — Pat
- “This motherfucker took my money and still told me to go fall off a cliff.”
- — Woolie
- “It's what's on your shit, not what's in your shit.”
- — Woolie
- “Man, you look like a burnt piece of fucking grape bacon.”
- — Pat
- “How about me? Always wrong. I'm making a career out of it here.”
- — Pat
- “Great shields in this game are great... shields.”
- — Pat
- “How many could there possibly be? One, two, oh they're inside my ass. They're in my ass. Help.”
- — Pat
- “I, however, am made out of metal.”
- — Woolie
- “You're made out of a bunch of crap.”
- — Pat
- “Why is everything so intent on proving me wrong?”
- — Pat
- “I am getting intense nostalgia shivers in my balls.”
- — Pat
- “You're so willing, it's actually suspect.”
- — Woolie
- “You snore like a bastard.”
- — Pat
- “It's basically an ability on my stat sheet at this point.”
- — Woolie
- “I need to toss a fireball every once and a while, just to remind myself I'm a pyromancer.”
- — Woolie
- “So we got haircut bitch-boy and doofus over here.”
- — Woolie
- “Can I join the covenant of the bird ass?”
- — Woolie
- “Sounds somebody did a slight amount of research.”
- — Pat
- “No, I'm just doing what you told me to drop last time.”
- — Woolie
- “Oh. Sounds like I'm smart.”
- — Pat
- “Oh my god, Kirito. Let me suck your dick.”
- — Pat
- “I'm the mouth fuck champ.”
- — Pat
- “Big sludge for big pudge.”
- — Woolie
- “I was about to say that's a death drop but then I saw a ghost fucking skating down the ramp.”
- — Woolie
- “Ireland's a weird place. Sorry, fantasy Ireland is a weird place.”
- — Pat
- “The big fuck door. I remember the big fuck door.”
- — Woolie
- “It used to come on after the Big Comfy Couch.”
- — Pat
- “♫The Big Fuck Door.♫”
- — Woolie
- “Also starring Alyson Court.”
- — Pat
- “Now commence ninety minutes of shit eating.”
- — Pat
- “I don't like this. I lose my power when you agree with me. All of my powers are built off of argument.”
- — Pat
- “Glomping is banned. They banned glomping at BlightCon.”
- — Woolie
- “You may notice that your pass is exuding miasma. Your Con pass.”
- — Pat
- “Try bravery. Do you have any of that? Be honest.”
- — Pat
- “This is a cool place to PVP.”
- — Woolie
- “Yeah.”
- — Pat
- “Is it?”
- — Woolie
- “No.”
- — Pat
- “A lot of things are ahead.”
- — Woolie
- “I've got 'a head' on my body. Nailed it! Fucking nailed it! I'm gonna win an award.”
- — Pat
- “I've gotta face fuck you. I'm sorry.”
- — Woolie
- “That's a horrible sentence I hope I never hear in my life.”
- — Pat
- “If I didn't suck so much I'd be better at it.”
- — Woolie
- “Man, I'm an idiot. Help.”
- — Pat
- “How did 9/11 get Shrek pregnant?”
- — Pat
- “Ohhh.. my butthole. I was saving that.”
- — Pat
- “Ceaseless Discharge!”
- — Woolie
- “I got a little bit of that. I gotta go to the doctor.”
- — Pat
- “You don't parry an asshole.”
- — Pat
- “Yeah! Get in me!”
- — Pat
- “Are the gods dropping balls to test me?”
- — Woolie
- “Maybe.”
- — Pat
- “Well fuck you, God. I'm gonna getcha.”
- — Woolie
- “My dick knows if it's a snek.”
- — Woolie
- “Baby, you got a funnel going.”
- — Woolie
- “That's horrific. I don't like that.”
- — Pat
- “Take off your pants..”
- — Pat
- “..and shit on the floor!”
- — Pat and Woolie
- “Now the cake should start walking.”
- — Woolie
- “Your phone is calling you to tell you that you're about to shit yourself.”
- — Pat
- “A white rat.”
- — Pat
- “What does that mean?”
- — Woolie
- “I don't know. It doesn't like hip-hop?”
- — Pat
- “Ever Since Dark Souls 1 came out in '98, I've known who this character.”
- — Pat
- “♫ I like my spear, I like my spear. Stab, stab, stab. Stab, stab, stab. ♫”
- — Woolie
- “Oh, we're in it today.”
- — Pat
- “♫ I like my sword, I like my sword. Slash, slash, slash. ♫”
- — Woolie
- “The dragon was the one that was the instigator, with that 'come hither' dragon look. You know the one.”
- — Pat
- “You don't know. Maybe dragon dicks are hilariously small. Is that not an option for you?”
- — Pat
- “I just can't get over what a great year 1998 was for video games. Ocarina of Time, Metal Gear Solid 1, Half-Life 1, and Dark Souls.”
- — Pat
- “Rot in fucking hell, if it exists. If not, go hollow.”
- — Woolie
- “Stabbing you in the ribs, like Jesus. I did him like Longinus did.”
- — Woolie
- “Helm of the fuck that killed my firekeeper. During his solitude, he forsook everything, for he believed in the path of being a bitch.”
- — Woolie
- “I heard that you can shoot her in the tits.”
- — Woolie
- “Yep, you can.”
- — Pat
- “And you can see them jiggle.. or something.”
- — Woolie
- “You see something. .. Who the fuck told you that?”
- — Pat
- “At nighttime, the not sun comes out.”
- — Woolie
- “Do I wanna become a girl right now?”
- — Woolie
- “He can be king of my dick if he wants.”
- — Pat
- “This LP is one of the ten cursed LPs.”
- — Pat
- “'Time to start playing KOF 14.', I said, knowing fully well I won't.”
- — Pat
- “Woolie 'The Gamecube was Blue'... you're mad. You're fucking mad.”
- — Pat
- “I'm legit exhausted with this conversation.”
- — Woolie
- “Then stop being wrong!”
- — Pat
- “Oh, there's friendly dick gestures. Like this.”
- — Pat
- “Welcome to Persona 5 LP! It looks like Dark Souls but don't worry about that.”
- — Pat
- “You are beneath my ass noise. That's where you are.”
- — Pat
- “I did a little doggy paddle there for the folks at home who couldn't see.”
- — Pat
- “My fleshy bits are awesome.”
- — Pat
- “I'm completely incapable of original thought.”
- — Pat
- “Now I can take my pants off because, Woolie, you can't see my penis in the dark.”
- — Pat
- “Hey, can't see it in the light either.”
- — Woolie
- “Imagine if you met a bunch of Smurfs. Would you be in their service as a knight to the Smurfs seeing as you'd be twice their size?”
- — Woolie
- “It depends if Papa Smurf was able to fucking Kaio Ken me through a wall or not.”
- — Pat
- “You just defeated Manus, the Primeval Man. What are you going to do next?”
- — Pat
- “Fap.”
- — Woolie
- “It's where the viewer can't see it and you look just as bad as you ever were but you're not, there's just less of you to cut out.”
- — Pat
- “That might just be artistic license for not animating a giant wolf dong.”
- — Woolie
- “Is Neto Dr. Gast? Find next out on our video, 'No. No he's not'.”
- — Pat
- “I'll never be able to to beat the Bed of Chaos... without pants.”
- — Pat
Those Who Invaded the World of Woolington[]
Part twenty-one | Vanquished by Woolington in Blighttown | |
---|---|---|
Maneater Mildred (NPC) | Part twenty-one | Vanquished by Woolington in Blighttown |
TheWoolieWatcher | Part twenty-nine | Slew Woolington in Sen's Fortress |
TheWoolieWatcher | Parts thirty, thirty-one | Returned to their world |
King Jeremiah (NPC) | Part thirty-three | Vanquished by Woolington in the Painted World of Ariamis |
TheWoolieWatcher | Part thirty-three | Dismissed offscreen after Woolington falls to his death |
Iluminatti312 | Part fifty-four | Slew Woolington in the Darkroot Garden |
Durmtzlaff | Part sixty-six | Vanquished by Woolington in the Duke's Archives |
Those Worlds that were Invaded by Woolington[]
Lautrec the Guilty (NPC) | Part thirty-eight | First Invasion: Woolington killed by a mage White Phantom NPC
Second Invasion: Woolington killed by a spear-wielding White Phantom NPC |
---|---|---|
Lautrec the Guilty (NPC) | Part thirty-nine | First Invasion: Woolington killed by Lautrec
Second Invasion: Slain by Woolington in Anor Londo |
Those Summoned By Woolington[]
Solidus | Part twenty-one | Slain by a Dark Phantom invader |
---|---|---|
Maneater Mildred (NPC) | Part twenty-four | Dismissed after Woolington dies during fight with Chaos Witch Quelaag |
Iron Tarkus (NPC) | Part twenty-nine | Defeated the Iron Golem |
Knight Solaire (NPC) | Part thirty-nine | Killed during the fight with Ornstein and Smough |
Knight Solaire (NPC) | Part seventy-six | Assisted in killing Gwyn, Lord of Cinder |
Those Who Summoned Woolington[]
No | One | Yet |
---|
Trivia[]
- The original Dark Souls episode was released during the third season of the Machinima series.
- The title card art was made by TheMothman.
- The music played during the intro is "Nameless Song" from Dark Souls.
- An amazingly detailed list of everything Pat has said that is wrong throughout the playthrough can be found here, created by Redditor minorou.