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Best Friends Play

Policenauts

Policenauts Title
[ Watch this series on the website]

Watch this series on YouTube

Game Policenauts
Original Run Aug 19, 2017 -
Controller Woolie
“You know what? We want to be up Hideo Kojima's ass, because that's the right place to be.” — Woolie


Best Friends Play Policenauts is a full Let's Play in which Pat and Woolie start their new career as a piece of shit private eye in the seediest city around, Old Los Angeles, home of biovestites, Italian porn bistros, and artificial assassins.


AboutEdit

— Website description

See the individual episode descriptions at the Policenauts Descriptions page.

Quotes Edit

You know who's not up his own ass? Not Hideo Kojima.
Woolie
That's righ.. wait. Who's not up his own ass? Not Hideo Kojima.
Pat
You know what? We want to be up Hideo Kojima's ass because that's the right place to be.
Woolie
I was so wrong so quickly!
Woolie
See, he looks really cool to us but to all these future people, he must look like a massive dork.
Pat about Johnathan
I am nixing that right away! None of this Little Finger shit going on in this LP!
Woolie
I need that guy's spleen more than I need a prostitute. That's a sad sentence.
Pat
You must bone my daughter.
Woolie
She's so bonely.
Pat
Yeah, it's a space watch 'cause we're going into space and that's why it looks like a fucking Roxio piece of shit from '92.
Pat
Make the joke you want to make, I can't make all your jokes for you.
Pat
Don't tell me to fuck off, tell Einstein to fuck off. It's his fault!
Pat
I don't yet have a racist name for him 'cause I'm still trying to work it out.
Woolie
I have been doing that also the whole time.
Pat
Good! Good! Fuck you, you fucking space colonists. Earth is the shit!
Pat on the Earth taunting space colonists
It's like an eye based unbirth.
Pat
AIDs has AI?
Woolie
And it's named after Gorbachev.
Pat
How would a snake fap with no arms? Think about it.
Pat
I would love to live in space, but I would tell everybody to go back to Earth.
Pat
This looks like the kind of guy that would sneak into the aerospace museum and start jerking off on the Wright brothers' plane.
Pat
Please don't Death Note my dad with a laptop
Pat
When people meet me in person they're like 'Wow, you're a short bitch.' and I'm like 'mmm...'
Pat
Even if Brazil sank into the ocean, the news would continue
Pat
So what we have here is a weird relationship between this weird jackass and this pretty redhead with a long term horrible illness.
Pat
Listen, when Hatsune Miku dies, it's gonna be really awkward to keep having a hologram up there of her dancing with Tupac.
Pat

Trivia Edit

  • The title card was made by norasuko.
  • The opening song in part one is "The end of beyond" from Policenauts.
  • The song used in the opening for all subsequent parts is "End Theme" from Policenauts, except for episode 9, where the ending is replaced by Pat and Woolie's own rendition.

GalleryEdit

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