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Two Best Friends Play

Ride to Hell: Much, Much Worse

Ride to Hell Full LP Title
Watch this series on the website

Watch this series on YouTube

Game Ride to Hell: Retribution
Episodes 19
Combined Length 09:52:35
Original Run Jun 17, 2015 - Jul 21, 2015
Controller Matt

For the original two-part series, see Ride to Hell Retribution.

“I humbly present to you... much, much worse.” — Matt

Two Best Friends Play Ride to Hell is a full Let's Play in which Matt and Pat start their own empty rebellion by cutting the sleeves off their jackets and joining a biker gang, but things go downhill immediately as they find themselves throwing fried chicken grease on prostitutes, visiting Plague's sex shed, blow up a crimson nirnroot farm, dry hump women to death, and Cactus Jack-it all over a strip club.

About[]

Oh fuck this jesus christ.
— Website description

See the individual episode descriptions at the Ride to Hell Descriptions page.

Quotes[]

So lots of people... seen comments saying 'hey, when are you gonna play something that's much, much worse than what you've been playing?' I humbly present to you... much, much worse.
Matt
The word 'execution' is not usually a word I associate with 'flaccid' but it somehow did that.
Matt
You know who I need to rebel against? THE GODDAMN VIETNAMESE!
Pat
Mad Max this is not.
Pat
That girl's going to feel really embarrassed when she turns around and it's just fucking Death behind her.
Matt
No, 'cause then Death's eyes are gonna pop out of his head, like 'Awooga!' because of her boobs.
Pat
If you want a instructional video kids, that's how you do it.
Matt
Right through the clothes.
Pat
Did you know violence is just one octave above sex?
Pat
I can interrupt my prompts with prompts!
Matt
Superman is a genre, it's called the bad genre.
Matt
It brought me closer to my spirit animal, the propane tank.
Pat
Most of your brain is kept in your blood.
Matt
Drug dealers are immune to gunfire. That's what The Wire taught me.
Pat
Imagine Benoit's on Snake Way just running. All we have to do is wish him back.
Matt
King Kai is gonna train him if he gets there in time.
Pat
I kiss Liam a lot of times but now that makes me think I should stop.
Matt
This is the most out of the way, absurd solution to a problem. Like, 'Oh no, my coffee's cold. Why don't I blow up a country instead of just heating it in the microwave?'.
Pat
Every time you have sex with a lady, the ghost of your brother should be there and be like…Hey remember me?
Matt
No, I'm Superman. You can't have any water!
Matt
What the fuck, my pants just went nuts.
Matt
Remember that crime spree last year where some motherfucker was burning down all those pizza places?
Pat
You mean Woolie?
Matt
Everyone's sucking on me. I'm gonna grow these pointy things.
Pat
Waterboarding with semen is bad.
Pat
To be fair if most Australian children saw something that could kill them, they’d just get on top of a car and say ‘witness me’
Matt
Didn’t Australia vote in a prime minister who is basically a giant spider?
Matt
Two percent is my favorite percent. It's the most delicious of all milks.
Pat
If you want the best weapons, kill cops. That's what Jake Conway would say. Not me, I would never say that.
Pat
Sorry, the King Dick is in another castle.
Matt
Being under the bus is okay as long as it's on your terms.
Matt
Doctor fucking Rockefeller. Doctor Nintendo World Store.
Matt
My mouth is agape and I am shaking my head at the confusion of where you are going.
Pat
You're baptized now, motherfucker!
Pat
I sexed you so hard you went back in time and became nothing.
Pat
I like hearing your pathetic little gun noises. Its like a turtle having sex.
Pat
Why would a society as advanced as the Federation of Planets still require dick tubes?
Pat
Obi Wan Kenobi and Quan Chi... *Uncontrollable laughter*.
Pat
Oh god, I thought he had a vacuum cleaner.
Matt
If you're a dirtbag, you don't wanna be good at your job.
Matt
Well unless you're Steve Jobs.
Pat
Evade capture with a distraction?
Matt
Take your clothes off.
Pat
I taught Apollo Creed's son to die in the ring just like his dad.
Pat, as Rocky
You need to support our Ride to Hell multiplayer beta or we'll fade away.
Matt
I bet you it's going to be really tame. He's gonna tickle his balls.
Matt
You haven't had to the whole game, because this is on easy, but now you actually have to do the mechanics.
Pat
That's what the QA department is for, is to boo the real developers.
Pat
And how do you say 'fully clothed sex', do you think?
Matt
Mardi.
Pat
I feel like dreams and souls have been lost in your couch.
Matt
Watch it be that you can actually catch up to him and then the game hard locks and erases the kernel on the 360 somehow.
Pat

{{Quoter|I'll put clothes on my 360. Then have sex with it.|Pat

Maybe we are scumbag LPers but in this moment, we're shining a light on poison.
Pat
How long can Jake drive in the frozen time?
Matt
There was a lot of ass rocket discussion.
Matt
God damn you, pipe. Everyone's laying you.
Matt

Trivia[]

  • The original Ride to Hell Retribution was a miscellaneous two-parter Matt and Patt played in 2013.
  • The intro and outro music is "Pressure and Time" by Rival Sons
  • The title card art was made by Kada-bura.
    • The belt buckle Matt is wearing is the same symbol used by Immortan Joe in the 2015 George Miller film, Mad Max: Fury Road, which was still in theaters when the Let's Play started.
  • Responding to a Friendcast e-mail, Matt stated that if he had to keep one LP on the channel (as opposed to deleting another), it would be Ride to Hell along with Prison Break. However, his final decision was Beyond Two Souls.
  • In part six (nineteen minutes in), what starts as a conversation about Quantum Break leads into a discussion about the DOOM novels which prompts Pat to order Knee-Deep in the Dead  by Dafydd ab Hugh and Brad Linaweaver. In that same conversation, they reveal that part six was recorded before the release of the E3 DOOM 4 trailer. Later, in part eight (at about 5:18), Pat expresses his desire to read it and considers reading passages from it aloud if the playthrough goes on long enough. Shortly after, he decides to insert them in the video descriptions instead - something that they had done from episode one. Pat said the viewers wouldn't understand until they got to part eight, implying that at least eight episodes of the playthrough was recorded before the release of the first episode on June 17, 2015.
    • If Matt and Pat's claim in part thirteen (50 seconds in) that they did the entire LP in nearly one weekend is true, then the entire playthrough could have been recorded before the release of the first episode.

Gallery[]

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