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Best Friends Play

The Cat Lady

The Cat Lady Title
[ Watch this series on the website]

Watch this series on YouTube

Game The Cat Lady
Episodes 15
Combined Length 7:49:46
Original Run Jul 9, 2017 - Aug 12, 2017
Controller Pat
“Trolling is me going to your Facebook everyday and posting the word 'butts', and you're like 'Pat, stop.', and I'm like, 'No. Butts.'.” — Pat

Best Friends Play The Cat Lady is a full Let's Play in which Pat and Woolie take a look into Pat's bleak future filled with cats, nightmare hellscapes, mental institutions, burnt time paradox hamburgers, one handed gaming, homicidal neighbors, and internet trolls.

About[]

— Website description

See the individual episode descriptions at the The Cat Lady Descriptions page.

Quotes[]

Is this a game about my future? It's got the #Elmoments with my kitty cat?
Pat
She took thirty-four sleeping pills.
Pat
Is that too many?
Woolie
Would you reach into your own butt?
Woolie
If I was in a dream hellscape?
Pat
Is this even a game? Am I even LPing?
Pat
The instant a friend of yours goes below frame, they're dead to you.
Pat
Would you like me to collect the Bafomdads for Andross?
Pat
Nah man, this is more like Curb Your Enthusiasm.
Pat
You had the option to continue blowing.
Woolie
Eighteen year olds.
Pat
Stressing out with their fidget spinners.
Woolie
Getting their fidget spinners stuck in their genitals.
Pat
Sometimes the sink just runs. That means Pat's been here.
Woolie
These asses are so huge, I want to live.
Woolie
I didn't know that such things were possible in this world.
Pat
My eyes have been opened... as well as the asses.
Woolie
Did you take another massive turd shit?
Woolie as a nurse
I did. I call it the Churchill.
Pat as Susan
I have not been in a murder basement in some time.
Pat
“'No one can take a shower in the dark.'.
Pat
Says you, Susan. You don't know who's controlling this.
Woolie
Nothing like a good smoke after a vicious murder.
Woolie
Andall you've got to comfort you is a burnt hamburger.
Woolie
Teacup's like, 'Let's not do that today, Joker.'.
Woolie
Who is this nice but edge lord?
Pat
If I was a little taller and had more hair, I'd look like a serial murderer, if I shaved.
Pat
You give yourself too much credit.
Woolie
Are you part of that emo subculture?
Susan
Please don't say that word ever again.
Mitzi
Subculture?
Pat
If that shit is in the future, I can't throw out the burger because it'll create a time paradox.
Pat
There are totally monsters in this world, they just wear the skins of man.
Pat
You got no romance in your body, Woolie. You got nothing.
Pat
I have the appropriate amount.
Woolie
Yeah it's really romantic until about two seconds after your death and you both shit all over yourselves.
Pat
You gotta, like, go up to the Big Ben, have a nice big hug, and then Izuna Drop each other.
Woolie
Ah, fucking ghosts. You don't believe in ghosts, do you?
Pat
No but I understand that people are kind of concerned with what's watching them fap.
Woolie
Trolling is me going to your Facebook everyday and posting the word 'butts', and you're like 'Pat, stop.', and I'm like, 'No. Butts.'.
Pat
I was just thinking, like, what are other games you can play one handed? Dead or Alive Beach Volleyball, Bayonetta...
Pat
Rumble Roses.
Woolie
And I'm like, this really fits in.
Pat
I'm playing Cat Lady with my right and I'm gonna give myself a stranger with the left.
Pat
Cats are good for killing house centipedes.
Pat
In my vagina?
Woolie
It's more likely than you think.
Pat
You're saying pregnancy is Dormammu?
Woolie
That's correct. It's the Dark Dimension.
Pat
I'm so fucking smart. Hey, I figured out the hard part. Did I? Tell me I'm smart. Shit, you're not even playing along. God damn it. This is a tough world I live in.
Pat
Who talks like that?
Woolie
Psychos.
Pat
Okay, fair enough.
Woolie
And then you're four years or five years old or six years old, and you walk in and go, 'Hey Mom, Dad, you're arguing over some bullshit. How 'bout you both shut the fuck up?'.
Woolie
I'm gonna steal this baby.
Pat
Steal a baby?
Woolie
Yep, gonna feed it to my cats.
Pat
Babies are idiots, man. They'd never understand the deeper meaning.
Pat
Cats don't get married, Susan. Unless you dress them up.
Pat
I was in the grocery store the other day and there was an old lady pushing a stroller and I was like, 'That's weird.', and then I looked in the stroller and there was a wiener dog, and I went 'Aww.', and then I went, 'Boy, that's my future for sure. One-hundred percent.'.
Pat
Oh my god! The cat ghost took out my sim card! And changed my screen saver!
Pat
She knows how to use Windows 10, does she? The Cat Widow installed Linux on my system!
Woolie
No matter what you are, there's other versions of you out there.
Woolie
You mean like clones?
Pat

Trivia[]

Gallery[]

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